" I will never be the same " this is what im presenting on Raymon Krill class just now .
My dad died when i was 17th years old . It carries a greater reality i felt when he died ... that will never be the same .
"I will never be the same " . In some ways , I see life as a puzzle cause every experience you have forms a piece of your unique puzzle . When you try to combined , they will form the entire picture of your life . My dad took e piece of my puzzle with him , a piece that will never return . I am incomplete without him . He knew me differently than anyone else . When someone you love dies , that part of you die as well . You can't re-live that memory with anyone else . Your puzzle may grow , but you can never replace that missing piece and because of that , I will never be the same again .
My view of the world also changed . I saw God's beauty in the smallest things . Life seemed to go on forever and i never thought about death .After funeral , that all changed . I lost my parent , my hero and my teacher. Start from that a lot of things that i learned on my own and its a great big things that i couldn't have understood in any other way .
I learned the importance of telling people that you love them . Don't ever let them wonder how you feel , Of all the things I regret , missing the chance to say " I love you PAPA" will never be one of them . I also learned to never pass up an opportunity to give or receive a genuine hug . When dad was dying i was terrified . I didn't know how to act , what to do and what to say , so i decide to sat in silence . When we hug each other i was about started to cry . That memory has broke my heart ever since . There are few words and fewer acts that can convey more emotion , more truth than a hug .
I will never be the same as someone who hasn't lost a parent . One of the hardest thing about losing a parent is feeling that nobody understand. Even worse is feeling different and seeing those differences every day . When your friend shows you a car that his dad bought for her or you see how happy her dad looks to walk he down the aisle , or when they complain about something their dad did you know you're not the same .
But sometimes being different can be a good thing , At first with bitterness , now with acceptance , I realized that there is no promise of tomorrow . You given such a small time , and you never know when your time will run out . Many people don't truly appreciate this . How can they've never had to think about death ? So treasure your life, make it worthwhile. Spend your life doing things that make you happy because you may not have the chance later. My life has been fuller, more beautiful, and more fun because I take chances that come to me. If my dad hadn’t died, would I always have played it safe? Would I have jumped out of that airplane? Would I have swum with dolphins or learned to scuba dive? Would I have hiked that mountain? Something tells me maybe not.
Because of my dad’s death, I will never be the same. I traded innocence and “fitting in” for understanding and appreciation. I lost my dad but gained something in return. Would I give up everything I’ve learned if I could have my dad back? I don’t have that option. The only option I have is to make those changes as valuable as possible. If Dad can see me, I want him to know that he’s still teaching me and still can see that how much i love him . Miss you papa . :)
Your Daughter,
Nil Aina Adibah
